


Jealousy Gets The Best Of Me

by mrbarbacarisi



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, Jealousy, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 02:57:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12003537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrbarbacarisi/pseuds/mrbarbacarisi
Summary: Sonny gets a little jealous of Rafael's past relationships.





	Jealousy Gets The Best Of Me

Sonny was going to break his pencil. His knuckles were white around the yellow-painted wood. It would snap any second. He didn't care.

What he _did_ care about was Rafael's gentle expression as he talked to Rita Calhoun. He was always able to joke with her, even while she defended rapists. They had a rapport. Before Sonny had started dating Rafael, he assumed that was because they had worked together as prosecutors before she took a lucrative job at a law firm. But now he knew differently.

They had dated at Harvard. Rafael had told him so when he and Sonny were commiserating over past relationships. Sonny had shared a few experiences with his ex-girlfriends on Staten Island. Rafael had shared his high school crush and Rita Calhoun. That was a week ago.

And now Sonny was overwhelmed with jealousy. He knew it was irrational. He knew it was stupid. But he still couldn't stop feeling it.

Rafael and Calhoun. At Harvard. Together. Laughing over coffee and subject outlines. Sneaking into each other's rooms late at night. She would have been an intellectual equal in all the right ways. A perfect match.

"Hey, Carisi," Rollins called from her desk. "Why don't you stop staring at your boyfriend and finish that paperwork?"

Sonny rolled his eyes and smiled, though he wasn't feeling joyful. Her teasing had started the second after he told her he was seeing Rafael. It only worsened when they had officially disclosed their relationship to the squad and the DA.

"Alright, alright," Sonny replied. "Back to work."

Sonny took in a breath and set his pencil down. He shuffled through the paperwork on his desk and tried to ignore Rafael and Calhoun talking in Benson's office.

This feeling was exceedingly stupid. Rafael had said that his relationship with her was casual, a way to blow off steam in between midterms and finals. It was purely physical. Nothing more.

And it obviously hadn't worked out between them. Rafael had been the one to break it off after they had graduated. Besides, he would _never_ even consider dating a defense attorney - _especially_ one who worked in sex crimes. Not to mention the fact that Rafael was in love with Sonny. Had been for years. Sonny had felt like the luckiest man alive when he had discovered that the feelings he had for Rafael were completely and enthusiastically requited. They were finally together. They were happy. He had everything he wanted.

Sonny picked up his pencil again and went back to work. He felt better. Content. Settled. And then, the door to Benson's office opened and out came the three of them: Benson, Rafael and Calhoun.

Rafael was laughing with her. Smiling. Happy. Like he was with Sonny. The tight ball of jealousy returned in his chest.

Before he could give it a second thought, Sonny stood and called across the room. "Counselor, can I talk to you for a moment?"

Rafael nodded in his direction. "Sure, Detective."

They mostly kept using their respective titles at work out of habit, but it also helped maintain their professionalism. Professionalism Sonny was about to ruin by - what? Reprimanding his boyfriend about someone he dated two decades ago? Had that _really_ been his plan? God, he was so dumb.

Now, Rafael had wrapped up his conversation with Calhoun and was walking straight toward him.

"What's up?" Rafael asked when he reached Sonny's desk.

Sonny couldn't think of a good enough excuse as to why he called him over.

"Uh, nothing really," Sonny said. "Do you want to get dinner tonight?"

Rafael gave him a curious look. They had spent almost every night together for the past month. It was just understood at this point. Asking was not a smart idea. Sonny really wished he hadn't opened his mouth.

"Do you have other plans?" Rafael asked coolly.

And now his boyfriend thought he was trying to skip out on him. Perfect.

"No, no, no," Sonny said hurriedly. "I'm good. I just, uh, wanted to make sure you were still, you know, good."

"Well, I am," Rafael replied in a tone that said he would be asking about this later. "See you tonight."

"Yeah. See you then," he replied. Sonny watched Rafael walk away before sinking back down into his chair. For the first time in their relationship, he was not looking forward to seeing him again.

* * *

A few hours later, in Rafael's apartment over Chinese takeout, the subject came up.

"Was there anything you wanted to tell me?" Rafael asked, giving Sonny a soft look. Similar to the one he had given Calhoun.

Sonny looked down at his food. "Um, no. Not really."

"Not really?" Rafael repeated.

Sonny shook his head and continued to poke at his rice with his chopsticks.

Rafael sighed. " _Cariño_ , look at me."

Sonny could never refuse when he used Spanish, especially pet names. He met his eyes.

"If something is wrong, you know you can tell me,” Rafael continued. “Okay? Don't suffer in silence because you think I'll judge or tease you. Because I won't."

"I know," Sonny said. "Nothing's wrong."

"Are you sure?"

Just because Sonny knew he was not going to let it go, he said, "It's stupid. Don't worry about it."

Rafael set down his chopsticks. "Whether it's stupid or not, it's obviously bothering you."

"But it shouldn't," Sonny replied, letting all of his pent up emotions from the past week tumble out. "I just see you with her and I can't help it. I know nothing would happen but it's there anyway." He crossed his arms over his chest, looking down. "It's stupid."

There was a long pause.

"Are you jealous of Rita?" Rafael asked.

When Sonny looked up, his boyfriend had a smirk on his face. That just made Sonny even more embarrassed.

"You calling her by her first name isn't really helping," he muttered.

Rafael laughed. "That's it? That's what got you so worked up?"

"What's so funny?" He demanded.

He shrugged. "Just nice to see the situation reversed for once, I suppose."

Sonny stared. "Who do you have to get jealous of?"

"Really? Sonny, do you think I never get jealous of your Melanie or _Jennifer_?" He emphasized the last name.

Jennifer had been the girl he might have proposed to if she hadn't left him for one of his close friends. Of course he was jealous. Now Sonny felt stupid all over again.

"And here I thought you were above such base emotions," Sonny snarked, a smile appearing on his face.

Rafael smiled in return. "It seems no one is immune to jealousy over their hot boyfriend."

Sonny leaned across the table to kiss Rafael. He responded readily but pulled back after a few moments.

"Your tie is in my soy sauce," Rafael told him.

"Worth it," Sonny replied as he sat back in his seat. His smile was even wider than before as he loosened and removed his tie. He could wash it later.

"You're such a dork," Rafael huffed, smirking once again.

“Sure, but I'm _your_ dork."

He chuckled. "Yes, you are."

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to my best friend [obsessive_compulsive614](http://archiveofourown.org/users/obsessive_compulsive614) for being my beta reader!


End file.
